This makes me so angry
Besides all the practical stuff we do on our smartphones:
- Checking our calendar
- online meetings
- ordering groceries
We also use our phones for something entirely different.
We use our phone as a buffer against strong emotions:
- I feel angry = I grab my phone
- I feel lonely = I grab my phone
- I feel bored = I grab my phone
We do this to lessen the severity of the feelings. By distracting ourselves with something else.
But the price can be high.
Let's look at an example.
Michelle a 32-year-old graphic designer was very unhappy with her job situation. During the day she would feel frustrated and often ended up picking up her phone either venting to a girlfriend or distracting herself from her frustration by spending time on Instagram.
Her job satisfaction was low but she was aware that her spending so much time on her phone didn't exactly help.
This went on for a year until Michelle broke her phone and she had to go without it for 48 hours!
During those 2 days, she couldn't use her phone to cope with the emotions that came up at work. What hit her was how much she had used the phone to distract herself from her dissatisfaction with her job situation.
Realising how dissatisfied she actually was in her job she decided to start looking for a new job.
When we distract ourselves - we often don't problem solve
If you are unhappy in a situation, job or relationship, but distract yourself by being on your phone too much, then you might miss out on what your emotions are trying to tell you.
Unhappy and frustrated = do something to change this situation.
If you continue to ignore these feelings, then you can end up never solving the very problem that you are trying to escape.
We hope that you see that hiding behind your phone won't bring you where you really want to be.
If you want our help to not use your phone too much